My Madelaine

I call it up instantly. All the scenes are right at hand, nothing left out. Perhaps some added to due to the unreliability of memory. Still, I see and sense it all vividly, clearly.

When Hawaii became a state, my great aunt and uncle took me with them to celebrate. My Aunt Mary married a native Hawaiian (this native title in some dispute as his mother was indigenous, while his father was born via a Portuguese man) and when she first stepped onto the family land in Honolulu she knew she was Hawaiian in her soul.

Uncle Ernie’s house was located on the family’s private acreage along the coast, the beach was near to deserted except for relatives. It was there I learned to swim. Aunt Mary did not swim herself, and most likely would not have been able to save me if anything unfortunate were to happen, but she had bought a flotation device, put me in the ocean, and told me I could swim.

The device was an elongated red ball probably made of Styrofoam although I am not certain. It strapped around my midsection with heavy canvas strips secured with interlocking metal rings. Technically, if I was an unsure first swimmer, a contraption like this would more than likely force my face down into the water. Instinctively, I knew to keep my head up. I kept kicking and making rapid circling motions with my hands and arms. Treading water as coached by my unable- to- swim instructor.

I felt peaceful in the water, at home. A natural water-girl was what they all said later that day as I finally withdrew from the waves, no longer assisted by my aunt. I learned to swim in the ocean in a few hours. I had no fear. Didn’t know it was an option. Had no clue to any possible dangers. All I knew was the joy of the surf, feeling the fizz of the broken wave as I swam out.

The red ball got carried off by the ocean, having been neglected on the shore as I ran into the waves. I pointed to it floating away, but my aunt said it had done its job and maybe someone who needed it would find it.

In magickal work, meditation, dream work, we use our richest powers of recall to invoke the mood and then hopefully the result we desire. This morning I desired peace. Finding that lost time in Hawaii, that red float, brought the smells and sounds of my time there. I went there and then brought the energy of that time and place back with me.

I feel calm and happy right now. I will not choose to break this spell, this energy. Despite worries I could focus on, lack, or fear, I am choosing this recollection and going with it. This time exists, it is not lost, needs no more than the willingness to recall it as completely as possible and the ticket to another time arrives and I am free.

I closed my eyes and the floating red ball brought me there. Now.

Recall your peace, your health, your happiness. It is there. Right now, right then.